I walked to a doctor's appointment today and left the apartment at 2:00 p.m., so as to give myself plenty of time. My appointment was for 3:30. I got there at 2:45 and wondered what on earth I would do. But it was a good sign that no one else was in the waiting room. Fortunately, for me, this doctor doesn't have many patients, and they took me right in, especially after I explained why I was so early.
I apologized to the receptionist: "I'm sorry I'm so early; I walked here." I pulled off J.D.'s black cap I had worn and started smoothing down my hair.
She gave me a quizzical look: "All the way from Washington?" Shocked, she glanced at the address from my open file. "Wow, that's a few miles!"
"Yes--" Me, thinking it was really no big deal. I just made the trip quicker than I thought I would. Is it really so strange that a person would walk anywhere? Maybe she was shocked because of the cold weather too. (It's in the low 30s here today).
But I didn't say that. Instead, I blurted out "My car was stolen."
Now, you may ask, what little imp gave me that devilish thought? Perhaps it was because she was already so shocked, part of me wanted to play the game further to really shock her?
If so, it wasn't conscious. I rather naively and innocently just tried to explain the reason I walk almost everywhere. I've been living with the reality of my car being stolen for several years now. I didn't stop to realize how someone unfamiliar with myself would interpret this as a recent event. (Or how most people with stolen cars actually replace them in a timely manner).
She gazed at me, astounded. "Oh!"
Then I realized I couldn't easily explain this event happened several years ago. So, I decided to just play along like the last 3 or 4 years didn't exist.
She snapped into action: "Oh, come right this way, you poor thing. Go right into the office on the left. The doctor will be in a minute."
When he comes in, the receptionist has evidently told him, and he asks me more questions about my stolen car than my health. Go figure. I guess it was the trade-off for fibbing. I ended up telling him the version of when my car was crashed and a bottle of Jim Beam left in the backseat as evidence.
He was then upset about the degenerate youth of today: "They're all either drunk or on drugs or don't have licences." -- I'm not entirely sure how that last one fit in.-- But he told me that he himself didn't like driving much. "I could never figure out the brake thing. My dad told me if I wanted to stop, to just run into a tree. I'm amazed I'm still here."
This was the friendliest this doctor had ever been with me. I didn't mind his chatting about his adolescence. It was fairly amusing. The whole visit was rather funny, and I was laughing to myself as I left.
And I made it home by 3:45-- not too long after my appointment was supposed to start!
2 comments:
Well, I don't think you were lying. It's not like your car wasn't stolen....TWICE!!!!! Out of your own parking lot!!!!! I mean it's not like you didn't lock it and take every precaution. And not to rip the band-aid off, but wasn't it more like 5+ years ago....you have been a real trooper. You should give yourself a reward for being a good citizen. You have been doing the environmentally correct thing and the healthy thing (not to mention the financially sound thing) for years....good for the doctor for taking you early!
I mean what were you supposed to do, install a removable steering wheel? Because as you know I can tell you from personal experience, those steering wheel "the club" thingies don't work. (I did tell you that story right...how Liz just picked it right off the car with two bobbie pins when we were living on our own in high school?). Plus, have you seen any major new anti-theft developments for cars lately?
Plus, you guys had replaced JD's car with a stick thinking that you could relearn it....I can tell you that I have never been able to learn stick...it's just too hard. Not to mention the fact that your poor bike was stolen too....despite the fact that you locked it in your locker in your locked basement to a moving trolley. I mean, those ARE some pretty strong anti-theft measures.
I was shocked that my bike was stolen when it was because the krypto-lock was cut right through (unbreakable my ass), and it was chained to the steel railing on our back porch. We didn't even have it in our basement in a locker. But then again, I have given up the idea of riding a bike with my epilepsy....hey do you want the one I have here? It's just sitting in my basement? It's not fancy, but it goes. It's one of those vintagey-styled types, it might be a Schwinn. The only problem is that the handlebars might have a bit of rust on them (yes it has been that long since I rode it). The only issue would be fitting into a trunk to get it to you......we could defintitely figure that out, though.
I actually miss the days when we only did have one car...I did a lot less stupid, useless driving to places like Target, and I would walk and take the train with Olivia everywhere. Although on super-cold days like it has been the past few days (it's like 4 here), I have to admit, we would just have cabin fever from staying in or we would be driving all over creation from dropping off Michael and then running all the errands, etc.
Just how far did you walk? She didn't think you walked from the town of Washington did she? In any case, after dealing with several moronic doctor's offices (including my father's surgeon yesterday), I am glad to hear of at least one that was nice and pleasant to you! You deserve it!
One more thing, did you see the Colbert report thing about the man named Plaxico? It has something very funny at the end, but I guess it is a bit of a private joke, but I don't want to spoil it.
OK, sorry about the super-long comment. May be I just should have called you, but I didn't want to call so early on a Saturday morning.
Smiles and hugs to you!
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